Daily quote by National Lampoon's Van Wilder

• Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but doesn't get you anywhere.
• Are you stalking me? 'Cause that would be super.
• Hey, look. That old bag is stronger than she looks.
• And thus, 'Topless Tutors' was born.
• Sharing a half-calf latte and a penalty box with Gwen Pearson who believes that censorship reflects society's lack of confidence in itself.
• Don't be a fool, stay in school.
• Don't be a fool, wrap your tool.
• All this time I thought I was more to you than some flaccid story.
• You must be Pre-Med Dick.
• Her name is Naomi. That's 'I MOAN' backwards.
• Richard, you rascal, you never told me you were a DIK! [under breath] Not that you had to.
• I'd like you to meet Sherri and Terri. Two girls utterly infatuated with men who have larger than normal... medulla oblongata's.
• Well, it is the NAKED mile run; everyone else will be in their birthday suits. Except for that guy...
• Write that down.
• Don't take life too seriously, you'll never get out alive.
• Those circus midgets can NOT hold their booze!
• Oh God. If he's here who's running hell?
• I learned a long time ago you can't treat every situation like it's life and death. Cause you'll die a lot of times.
• Sometimes you gotta let your heart lead you, even if you know it's someplace you know you're not supposed to be.